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If all women sent more messages, would they get more responses? Women rarely reach out, no matter their circumstances. Written by Kelly Cooper.
A simple adjustment If a woman sends the first message, everything changes in her favor. So how does the quantity of messages received affect women? Traditionally, men take the initiative. The playing field is also pretty even: This means that if a woman does nothing, her inbox will be filled with less attractive men.
Others are direct references to penises.
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Header illustration by Shawna X. Yet doing this research unlocked a secret — the OkCupid ecosystem actually puts women at a huge advantage.
The truth about messaging When we looked specifically at sending the first message, we found one striking habit: Yet there is one crucial way in which women fail to take the lead. These women are progressive too, with 43 percent of women preferring to split the check compared to 17 percent of men.
Rarely do the two collide: Designed by Shane Zucker. No matter how attractive a woman appears, we see similar messaging behavior. Or presenting the other with an elaborately carved spoon. So if you typically wait to be approached, you could elevate your game by about 12 percent points just by sending the first message.
Sign up for OkCupid.
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The odds are in your favor. To put a number on it, men are reaching out to women 17 percentile points more attractive, and women contact men who are 10 percentile points more attractive.
Perhaps they enjoy basking in the glory of being one of the elitely attractive. Data Science by Dale Markowitz. Want to be a part of this report, and future ones?
But to get things started, someone has to make the first move.
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So we asked ourselves: Those sending the first message are already getting results. On the contrary, men initiate no matter what, and the more messages they receive, the more they send. Most women — regardless of sexual orientation — do not send the first message, with straight woman 3.
On OkCupid however, women and men exhibit similar behavior when it comes to liking, browsing and having conversations. Men, however, message most between the ages of 20 to In fact, women are 2. In the physical world, maybe that means a subtle wink.
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